Wednesday, March 21, 2012

Sidekick!

Neela asked me if I wanted to share my views and comments on Dhyanyogi's page and I just was not prepared to take that request up. Its so unlike me - All my life I have loved to be the center of the universe that I lived in. And if someone felt that they valued my opinion - I would have just given spiels of it!

My opinions mattered to people around me and I cherished the attention that I received at each stage of my life. Unconsciously I began living as if the world was created for me and everything around me existed for me!

The greatest lesson I learnt in the last few years was that each man is filled with a lot of ego. We do not even realize that it exists in us. Every desire in us - from greed to lust - can all be traced and explained beautifully if we understand the phenomenal importance that 'ego' assumes in ourselves.

Not long ago, I thought I would make the greatest dad that ever existed and believed that I could teach my son everything that he needed to know! I could teach him math, I could teach him how to handle emotions, I could teach him how to run an enterprise, I could teach him how to prepare for a sports championship - I thought I could just mold him to be a super-human! Only to shockingly realize that I had far more things to learn from him than what I had to offer him!

Can I be like him - when he smiles with reckless abandon? Can I be like him - when he just forgets that he was upset just a while ago and be in his joyous state? Can I be like him - with absolutely no grudges against anyone for more than a few seconds? Can I be like him - Live in the absolute present and not worry about the future? Can I be like him - when he just does what he thinks is right?!?

It just dawned on me that I 'knew' was precious little! It continued to reinforce in me that I am a mere speck of a star in a larger Galaxy! Surprisingly though it did not demoralize me or bring me down crashing! It just helped me understand the bigger picture and the specific role that I had to play in the larger cosmic drama - and I for once was willing to forfeit the crown to others around me.

How else could I explain that I sit only in the last row of the yoga class? - damn! I was NEVER a 'last bencher' in any activity that I participated! How else can I explain that I prefer to be absolutely silent in most activities that I partake in? How else can I explain that I now delegate work more easily at work and try to learn how other people handle similar situations? I am simply loving not living under a imaginary and un-real 'me-centric' world.

The danger of believing that you are the only rock-star is that you inevitably tie up bench marking your worth to the way other people treat and perceive you! You hold your self worth ransom to how others manipulate you!

I love the way I am slowly learning to move away from the central stage and cling on to the only 'permanent friend' - some folks call him Super Power while some others prefer to call him God!

Yes - I will probably go back and write a few lines about Dhyanyogi's teachings. But I pray that I can implement what I write there in my own life. I know I can get away from the 'world' even if I do not follow what I write there - but for me - for my inner self satisfaction - I pray that I have the strength to walk my talk!

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